We know far more about ourselves than we are prepared to admit. Admission opens the way to change, change is often painful, and we would all prefer to avoid suffering.
The fact remains that no-one knows us like we know us. In this case, however, knowledge is not enough. We need understanding. What is it that motivates us, what have we learned from past experience, and what is it that has brought us to this very point in our lives?
To get to that awareness requires honesty and honesty can be complicated.
The result is that we spend far too much time and energy in self-denial. We refuse to accept. We prefer to sidestep and avoid any confrontation with ourselves.
That means nothing is resolved. We continue to carry confusion and pain. We paper over the cracks in our lives and refuse to acknowledge that they exist.
The strategy can work…until we are confronted by a crisis situation. It’s a times of crisis that we need to call on all our personal resources. The strength and support of others only goes so far. We need ourselves.
It’s at those points in our lives that we have nothing more than the reality of the situation and our ability to cope. It’s at those points in our lives that we do not need to find ourselves wanting.
Recovery from setback is always possible but the work entailed in that recovery is much more difficult and trying if we have nothing on standby in our emotional bank.
Consideration of others should always be promoted and encouraged but self-sacrifice must have its limits.
We have to ensure that we take the time to regather our thoughts and support our own spirit.
Self-preservation is essential to survival and it does not require the exclusion of all others.
But it starts with the effort we put into being our own best friend and maintaining that relationship.
Gary Bentley Counselling 