Coping Not Hoping

Living our best life means coping with our worst moments…again and again.

Along the way we pick up skills that help us to make sense of those things that are happening in us, through us and around us.

When it comes to psychological survival, what works for one person may not work for another. We adapt and adjust that which is available to us in a bid to get the best result. We get to know us and, hopefully, we use that knowledge and understanding to take care of the person we know ourselves to be.

Some challenges need only quick and simple solutions. Others are so daunting that we compartmentalise them and store them in the recesses of our mind. And therein lies a looming threat. Our minds have a limited capacity when it comes to warehousing unresolved issues.

We can expect too much of ourselves. We can over-estimate both our coping skills and our storage levels.

Issues kept hidden or intentionally forgotten can become emotionally cumbersome robbing us of our joy of life and our sense or purpose making our todays burdensome.

The older we get the more we have to remember and regret. But memories are permanent while regret is a choice. The mistakes and missed opportunities of the past belong in the past. We can reimagine the past but we are unable rewrite it.

It’s vital, therefore, to find ways to make peace with ourselves. That may include the pain of confrontation and the acceptance of consequence.

But we are talking about mental wellbeing, fulfilment and happiness. The effort to achieve those is worth it.