Eventually it’s necessary to accept that not everyone we encounter is kind and well-intentioned. In fact it’s rare to find a relationship that is pain free.
We spend our lives seeking emotional connections. We are driven by the need to love and be loved. We have a need to be part of a bigger picture.
Along the way, however, we become damaged. People hurt other people. The pain inflicted can either be intentional or accidental. But pain is pain and sometimes the underlying reason for it happening can be uncertain. We are left both injured and uncertain.
What remains is a level of brokenness…damaged people meeting other damaged people and attempting to cobble together something they see as a form of desirable perfection.
There can be a direct link between what we’re offering as an individual and what we we’re offered. If we want a better result we must be prepared to make a better effort.
While it’s possible to help another person survive and ever repair their own brokenness through guidance and empathy, it’s not possible to force the change we want to see. The best we can hope for is to work towards changing our own situation – both physical and psychological.
The strength for change lies within…within ourselves, not within someone else. Survival is very much about reinvention. It’s about honest reassessment and a determination to improve.
It’s important for everyone within our circle of influence that we persist with the effort to be a little better, a little stronger and a little wiser today than we were yesterday. More than that it’s absolutely essential for our own wellbeing.
Connections can be made, maintained and even flourish if the right amount of conviction and effort are put into them.
If we expect little and give a lot our world will be a much happier, friendly place.
Gary Bentley Counselling 